Saturday, August 8, 2009

Blue Jays GM Confirms There Never Really Was A 'Roy Halladay'

Here's some fake quotes from the fake press conference the Blue Jays had concerning the fake Roy Halladay. Funny stuff courtesy of The Onion. Click here for the full story. Warning for Blue Jay fans.. some harsh humor ahead.

"Roy's my uncle's name. And whenever we needed a face, like for his baseball card, we just used a picture of our UPS guy."
"Roy Halladay is just the latest in a long string of completely fictitious Blue Jay greats, a list that includes Dave Stieb, Jesse Barfield, and Joe Carter, whose home run to win the 1993 World Series was actually just a two-run single in the seventh inning by Paul Molitor."
"Those first couple of years you can't really control [playing in Toronto], but then you demand a trade and get out of there," ex–Blue Jay Orlando Hudson said.

When asked if he remembered playing with a Roy Halladay, Hudson said, "I don't remember any of my Blue Jay teammates."
"Baseball is built on little deceptions: the curveball, the hidden-ball trick, the existence of Stan Musial. And we're not the only team who bends the truth. The Padres played 212 games last year just to make a little extra money. Just slid by and no one noticed. Milwaukee doesn't even have a third base."

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